Phobia! Everyone has some of this. Dormant or not! Read somewhere, being phobic ( or rather getting phobic ) is a phobia itself!
Am phobic to asymmetry! Lots! Sounds weird? Well, it is, unwind this weirdness as you read on!
Even as I am writing this, am hoping to give a touch of symmetry to this post in my own possible way. May seem crap, but I define it this way;
Symmetry is my obsession, and asymmetry- the complete phobia surrounding me!
I know its kinda 'maniacy', but hey everyone does have a passion to either hate or love or get obsessed with something. Might be dormant in you, but if you think, think and just keep thinking, it will definitely erupt in you.
Depending on what it is, it can be good or bad, harmful or just neutral. It's all on your luck and flavor.
Coming back to symmetry, it's maybe because being a student of science and maths that it's so relevant in my life. And moreover, dwelling in programming, it has made me believe that nothing ever can exist that is even more beautiful that SYMMETRY!
That's my obsession, and that's the virtual height of it!
The other day, in Belgaum ( Oh, well I really did have a nice time in Belgaum with an all-cousins meet, birthdays and lots more jungle hangouts! Pics coming soon!! ),
my cousins and myself, we were having a game of cards. I wasn't really interested in choosing my strategy for the game of cards, but i was rather thinking about the pack of cards and relating stuff...
( By the way, I won the game of cards! )
This is what all I had to think:
Life is like a game of cards. It can be as random as when the cards are shuffled or as in sequence when it's arranged! All on time and situations.
Imagine some of the cards to be some bad events and some good ones. It's always that we know there are events of varied types and we do know that they have always existed, but it's still that we have to regret over the existence or non-existence of everything. We do it quite often, don't we??
It's all about playing your cards well. You might end up with varied cards of different cadre and color which have their own significance. And sometimes, you might end up with a joker, don't be surprised! You really do need all these elements of life. You need cards like a joker, cause some of the default cards can't satisfy the momentary requirements.
Moving on, I get into more of thinking. And, I start wondering whether if at all I am a perfectionist!
I always knew I was a perfectionist. But the world just doesn't see me that way. And somewhere deep down, I knew I wasn't one of those typical types of perfectionists with a sparkling smile over their 'near-perfection' achievements!
I knew I was something else, though not too much of a deviation from the ideal.
Hence, here's a conclusion I've got after lotsa thinking.
There are two kinds of perfectionists. First ones are the types which never leave any task incomplete and are hell bent on completing everything they come across.
The second type would be who destroy or deinitialize any task they have undertaken. After all or nothing, both are perfections right??
Mind you, deinitializing does mean recoil to the initial, not letting off go or compromising with your standards or activities.
I undoubtedly belong to the second category.
Belgaum, being my native place; sometimes I have a strong belongingness to that place, and sometimes am just glad I unbelong as i call myself an 'Unknown Goan'! (Does mean that I belong a bit to everywhere, but not necessarily the same way I would think every second.)
I say know your roots. If you don't want to, or don't want to, due to the different situations and times, then make your present level your root and move on to higher grounds.
In short, progress or rather move out, if you can't move in deeper and relate to where you currently belong.
But remember one thing; don't ever forget where you belong now. It's human tendency to have a sense of belongingness somewhere or to someone. And if you are lucky, you might just have the right place or person to belong to. The world will envy you, but the nerve of 'botheration' shouldn't really be visible on your forehead. If at all it is, you end up losing your happiness.
And in a case where you don't get the better of the two worlds, make your world the best one! In any case, don't compromise with your happiness.
Happiness shouldn't really be a state of mind, but an ego to be accomplished at any cost. This way, you remain happy forever.
After all, the most important person in this world should be you! No one thinks as much about you as you think of yourself. There is nobody quite so much interested, and it is not right they should be.
each has his own admiration in himself. Think about this.
Whatever you desire or deeply form an intent for, you can have, for in the development of your interior thought-forces your desires will frame them within measurable size.
Commitment for yourself is vital. For as it touches you, you touch all points in the universe!
Your first duty is to yourself. You do not perform for the world, you perform for an audience of one- YOURSELF!!!
So long, Happy Being YOU! ( Phew, that was a long one after a long time! That's what you call piled up thoughts! )